Phil Harrison Coaching

Many of us have been through the annual health checkup where the doctor conducts labs and undertakes a visual clinical examination of our physical condition. One of the measures that is often seen in the results is the BMI, which stands for Body Mass Index. It measures our height, weight, muscle, and body fat and we get a numeric representation of our physique. 

If we were to undertake a regular relationship checkup, we might look at all the factors that are involved in relationships and report it as a BMR, a rating that is a representation of our building, maintaining, and restoring of relationships. In the book Every Connection Matters: How to Build, Maintain, and Restore Relationships Inside the Classroom and Out, authors Michael Creekmore and Nita Creekmore share the following keys to successful relationships (pp. 8-11): 

1. Trust. Your colleagues and your students need to develop trust with you. Trust encompasses many factors, but we generally think of it in terms of acceptance and keeping confidence in matters that require confidentiality. A simple way to think of it is “do what you say you will do.” 
2. Authenticity. The authors define authenticity as the ability to be your 100-percent true self at all times and in every space. That’s a very tall order, but it is understood that we need to be real with other people if we want to have meaningful relationships.
3. Respect. The authors define respect as the due regard for the feelings, wishes, rights, or traditions of others. Respecting others is a commitment that requires work on our part. It is critical to developing relationships. 
4. Communication. The authors define communication as a way to express your needs and wants and to convey information to one another. I could spend weeks and months on this part of relationships and still not cover it all. In short, if you want to build relationships, you will need to share yourself and your stories with others in meaningful ways. 

Schools thrive on the foundation of relationships. As you prepare for the week ahead, reflect on your relationship-building within your school and your classroom. Commit to improving in this area, and you, your students, and your colleagues will be glad you did!